I am Tilarin.
I don't know who gave me that name, since I have had no family for
more years than I care to admit. I have no last name, since I have no
family. Memories of my puphood are few and far between-- much like canis
in Sable-- but they are there, and they are what make me Tilarin.
I was born to a single mother, one of a large litter. I have never
had a sire, and honestly never missed having one. When I was barely old
enough to function, my unusually alert senses said danger. I didn't know
where I could go, or how I would survive alone. All I knew was that if I
stayed I would die. And so, with eyes newly opened and limbs that still
trembled, I crept out of my dam's shack late one night and never looked
back.
I wonder sometimes about my littermates. I've never known what
happened to them, though I suppose they are dead. I feel no real guilt
for leaving them, though I know I should. I did what I had to in order to
survive.
I don't know how far I toddled, but finally I was so cold and hungry
that it didn't matter. I curled up in a tiny ball, shivering and starving
and utterly alone, and tried to think. But I couldn't. My mind was as
numb as my tail.
I don't know when I realized I was dying. It was a bit hard to
accept, but it was there, more plain than anything else. I was going to
die, unknown and unloved, in a frozen alley in a village with no name.
That was when she found me. A large, plump, motherly canis lady. I
don't know why she was there, or why she even bothered with a strange,
half-frozen pup. But she took me home and thawed me out and fed me and
nestled me in with her litter. I soon learned that one of the pups had
died shortly after its birth, and that Momma wanted me to take its place.
Well, it meant a roof over my head and food, so I obliged them.
We were actually rather poor, but not as destitute as my real dam.
My sire was a large, roughish, rather gruff adult canis. He loved us all,
quietly, but he did. He never had to say so, but he was devoted to us,
and most especially to Momma. Together they took better care of us than
any other parents I could have ever imagined. From them I learned love.
From them I learned friendship, and devotion, and caring, and kindness.
From them I began to believe that maybe the world was good and fair after
all. Not everybody I would meet would be like my dam. And once that sunk
in, I loved them so fiercely that it burned in my heart.
One day, I was for one reason or another in the village square. I
happened to overhear a pair of rich merchant princes talking, discussing a
new business venture they were planning. They were talking, specifically,
about the lot they wanted to build their new shop on. They said it was
occupied, by a filthy poor family that wouldn't be hard to oust. It didn't
take long for me to realize that they meant MY family. I didn't wait to
hear more, but tore off for home as fast as I could.
My sire and dam were gone, and my littermates refused to believe me.
By the time I convinced them that we should at least go find Momma and
Poppa, I heard the merchants coming.
We stood frozen in terror as they burst in, and then scattered in
all different directions. There were three of them. They had torches, and
two of them bore between them a large burlap sack, that contained some-
thing very large and awkward to carry. Whatever it was, stained the rough
canvas sack a sticky, dark red color.
I lost track of my littermates as I fled. I quickly noted that I
couldn't get out-- there was only one door, which was where the merchants
were. I spotted a tiny hole in the floorboards and squeezed my body
through it. I left a good deal of skin and fur behind, but I made it.
All I could do was lie still and pray that they wouldn't find me.
Overhead, the clomping footsteps of the huge humans seemed almost
ready to bring the floor crashing down on my tiny hiding place. I froze
in terror when I realized that one of them was standing directly over me.
I could hear the yelps and howls of my littermates as they were found,
one by one. Then something warm and sticky began to drop through the
boards and into my tightly eyes, which I squeezed tightly shut.
Then they set fire to the house. I heard a heavy thud as they
dropped the heavy sack they had been holding, and the crackle of spread-
ing flame. I panicked, knowing that I was completely trapped here, under
the floor of a burning house. I couldn't think of anything to do but lie
still and beg Mortis not to come for me yet.
When the fire finally died down, I squeezed back up out of the hole
in the floor. My home was a charred ruin. Tiny heaps of scorched fur and
blood marked where my littermates had fallen. The burlap sack, now burned
to a crisp, revealed the roasted corpses of two adult canis.
Momma and Poppa.
I howled and I cried over them until my eyes ran dry and my throat
was on fire. For days I neither slept nor ate. I couldn't leave them. I
was a curse. This was already the second family I'd lost. If my real
family was dead, then it was two families that had died. I had cursed
them somehow. Better to lie down and die here, with the ones I loved.
I fully intended to die there, too. But I heard the merchants
returning and I had to go. To stay would be certain death. Why give up?
I still had my life in front of me, if I left now. Maybe Fate had some-
thing in store for me yet. And so I got up and ran, blindly, as fast as
my weak legs and half-burned body could take me.
I ran for only the Aether know how long. When I could run no
further, I was at a dock, where a magnificent boat was anchored. I
decided then and there to seek my fortune across the sea. So I snuck on
board.
The trip was not long, and I stayed hidden the whole way. When we
docked, we were at the gates of some strange, magnificent city. I entered
and was awed at the beauty of the place. I knew I had to make this city
my home.
My empty stomach had other ideas, though. I hid under a bench some-
where and waited. Finally an enormously fat merchant chanced to sit on
my hiding place. I carefully-- and very quietly-- opened his purse and
relieved the greasy slob of a handful of coins. I knew now: I was a
thief for life.
As I grew to know more about the city of Sable, I learned about the
various guilds. I learned to recognize fighters, mages, clerics, and
psions. But the people of the mysterious ebony cloaks intrigued me the
most. After a few weeks of watching them, I suddenly realized: they must
be a guild of Thieves.
I knew at once I had to join them. I had to join them if it cost me
everything I owned. So I applied, was interviewed, and told that I was
accepted-- if I could find the entrance myself. After a few more days of
wandering up the rich avenues and down the trashy back alleys of the
city, I finally stumbled onto a dead end. I turned around and was about
to keep looking when a sharp pain at the back of my head felled me. I
awoke in pitch blackness. I was bound, a total captive, completely
helpless.
A hissing whisper came at me through the darkness: "Join or die."
Instantly recognized that I had found the thieves. I joyfully
answered that I would join, and was freed, given an Ebony Cloak of my
own, and told the secret of the guild.
Since then I have met many of my guildmates, died a couple of times,
and grown to know the rather large family I've become a part of. And
although I miss my old family, I have to say that I wouldn't trade my
new life as a cutpurse in the City of Sable for any other.
I now add to this writing, because my life has changed. I've made, I hope, some progress in
my hopes to join the Church of Chronos, Goddess of Time and Fate. Also,
and most importantly, I've discovered that one of my original littermates
did, after all, survive. From the litter that I first fled, choosing for
myself a life on the streets. She, too, made her way to Sable, guided I'm
sure by the hand of Chronos. She even belongs to my guild, and is perhaps
known to you who read this. Her name is Seridia, and she is my sister. I
thank all the Aether that I have found her and been able to exchange
stories with her, to learn what became of her after I ran out on her and